Dealing with Difficult Coworkers – Part I

A List of Do’s and Don’ts

A job is so much more enjoyable when you like the people you work with. Unfortunately, there’s usually a bad apple in every bunch, and sometimes that difficult coworker can make your job more difficult. From Chatty Cathy’s to White-Collar Bullies, there are lots of personality types that can cause conflict in the workplace. But there is something you can do about it. Here are 10 do’s and don’ts that will help you deal with difficult coworkers:

1. Do examine yourselfFirst and foremost, examine yourself. Do you often experience difficulty with coworkers? Are you struggling with individuals that no one else has taken issue with? If you find that you are constantly butting heads with colleagues then it’s a good idea to do some reflection and determine if you are the common denominator in these situations. If you are, it’s time to work through some personal issues that may be causing the conflict.2. Don’t avoid your feelingsWhenever there’s conflict and tension in the workplace it can take a toll on you emotionally. Acknowledge your feelings so that they don’t sneak up on you later and reveal themselves in an emotional outburst at work. Recognize that what you’re experiencing is important and needs to be addressed.3. Do confide in a friend or family memberThis will help you process your feelings. Sometimes when we’re involved in a work-related conflict it can be difficult to maintain a realistic perspective as the tension begins to warp our view. Talking with an objective third party can help with that. Not to mention you may also get some good advice on dealing with the problematic coworker.4. Don’t gossipAvoid gossiping at all costs; complaining to your colleagues about the individual won’t make things any better. All it does is generate negative energy that will cause your bad feelings to build. And the last thing you want is for your nemesis to catch wind of your water cooler moments and then use them against you.5. Do consider your optionsThere are lots of ways to deal with a difficult coworker; the important thing to remember is you must deal with it. You can confront the individual, standup to the individual when appropriate, publicly call them out on their behavior, or have a heart-to-heart with him/her. You have lots of options and should consider the pros and cons of each before you act.

It can be discouraging to work with an individual who is causing tension or discomfort for you in the workplace. But you must always remember that you can influence the course of your life, and that includes dealing with a difficult coworker. Come back next week when we’ll talk about the following:

6. Don’t avoid the problem7. Do confront the coworker8. Don’t take the low road9. Do involve others, if necessary10. Don’t expect poor treatment